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If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.

There’s no formula. Keep busy with your work and your life. You can’t become a professional mourner. It doesn’t help you or others. Replay the good times. Be grateful for the years you had.

I just laugh. Have I got them fooled.

Get at least eight hours of beauty sleep, nine if you’re ugly.

Animals don’t lie. Animals don’t criticize. If animals have moody days, they handle them better than humans do.

I like those touches of chivalry that are fast disappearing. If I sound old-fashioned, it’s because I’m as old as I am! But it’s just polite.

People say, ‘But Betty, Facebook is a great way to connect with old friends.’ Well, at my age, if I want to connect with old friends I need a Ouija board.

Mind your own business, take care of your affairs, and don’t worry about other people so much.

Friendship takes time and energy if it’s going to work. You can luck into something great, but it doesn’t last if you don’t give it proper appreciation.

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A lady likes to be complimented on her looks, her eyes, her figure. But the personality comments are much appreciated.

So you may not be as fast on your feet, and the image in your mirror may be a little disappointing, but if you are still functioning and not in pain, gratitude should be the name of the game.

Why do people say “grow some balls”? Balls are weak and sensitive. If you wanna be tough, grow a vagina. Those things can take a pounding.

I have no regrets at all. None. I consider myself to be the luckiest old broad on two feet.

It is important that you not believe your own publicity. Be grateful for whatever praise you receive, but take it with a grain of salt.

You can always tell about somebody by the way they put their hands on an animal.

I just make it my business to get along with people so I can have fun. It’s that simple.

I may be a senior, but so what? I’m still hot.