6 beers

2 glasses of wine 

2 bottles of wine .. shared, of course 

too many margaritas 

3 kamikazes 

7 rum and Cokes 

1 LARGE purple haze 

3 Martinis 

1 Bottle of Tequila

1) It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, but the size of the fight in the dog − Archie Griffen.

2) Nothing lasts forever. Not even your troubles − Arnold H Glasgow

3) There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle − Albert Einstein

4) Take chances, make mistakes. That’s how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave – Mary Tyler Moore

5) Being strong means rejoicing in who you are, complete with imperfections − Margaret Woodhouse

6) If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place − Nora Roberts

7) I’ve missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I’ve been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed − Michael Jordan.

8) The only place you find success before work is in the dictionary − May V. Smith

9) Where hope grows, miracles blossom − Elna Rae

10) A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing − George Bernard Shaw

11) Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent − Eleanor Roosevelt

12) It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else’s eyes − Sally Field

13) I quit being afraid when my first venture failed and the sky didn’t fall down − Allen H. Neuharth

14) Hope never abandons you, you abandon it − George Weinberg

15) Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you − Ralph Waldo Emerson

16) Awards become corroded, friends gather no dust − Jesse Owens

17) People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in their true beauty is revealed only if there is light from within − Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

18) Nothing splendid has ever been achieved except by those who dared believe that something inside of them was superior to circumstance − Bruce Barton

19) Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it − John Maxwell

20) Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn’t be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn’t know that so it goes on flying anyway − Mary Kay Ash

More albums:
- Some great pics by Zoran
- Pics by Areti
- Excellent pics by Atman

28th Tuesday 2010
Been falling asleep at 4am so waking up was a mission. Watched some great Google Tech Talks on meditation while packing. Crazy dump. Now I wait for the bus at the stop and was wondering why nobody was standing under the shade so I went there to put my backpack on the bench but it was wet and muddy. I just thought it was some kids standing on them. A minute later a car passes and splashes me totally. It all makes sense now!!!! But at the cost of my fresh combats! Ok can’t worry about this I gotta get to Victoria Station. Get weird looks on the bus but I’m too busy listening to the J. Cole Mixtape Viv had been going on about. Get to Victoria extra early so kill time with a meal, reading and good ol people watching while I wait for Sarojben to give me some parcels for the Ashramites. Get the stuff just in time to board the train… sleep till Three Bridges. Link with Suresh and wait for Katie to pick us up. Get a bad migraine. Gordon had prepared the fire so we keep warm and discuss AOL UK politics. After we had enough of that we get into a great meditation before an even greater meal. I went nuts on the cheeses and that lovely schtalin cake (spelling). I was going nuts with the ghee too on the breads, cakes… whatever I could put it on. Chill and chat before knocking out.

29th Wednesday 2010
Kriya. Katie drops us to Gatwick. Man Suresh had it all planned out… first time I set in the front seat right next to the door. Sleep till landing in Basil. Get busses and trains to Oppenau. Meet with Arian (French/Persian) or something like that halfway through. Shuttle to the ashram and sort out room, do some seva, hang and check out whats new. The internet room has become the fireplace and tea room, very nice and cozy. Lotttssss of people with laptops which I still can’t get used to but I’m glad to see most of those lappys were Apple Macs! Represent! Dinner, satsang… the Latin Americans went on strike with Guruji… they’re like no seva, no food, heaven is closed picketing style… having a tantrum asking Guruji to come to Argentina and places. Sleepy knowledge? (can’t remember). Chill with Justina… we normally chat on FB so first time I hear her voice and she sounds soooo cute man. Sleep. Man my roommate was very docile but a entertaining terror at snoring. I’ve never heard such random snoring… one minute he’s a bubbling brook, then from one animal sound to another… the funny ones kept me awake with laughter, the bad ones kept me awake with dread… like was he turning into a beast or something… what was going on!?

30th Thursday 2010
6am Yoga, brekkie, Kriya, meditation, lunch. Now I was on lunch serving seva so we get to go ahead of the queue to be in places but this A-hole doesn’t let me through… I was like I’m serving man! Then I realized it wasn’t even lunch break lol. But anyway he was an A-hole and over the week folks would be avoiding him like a plague. Even when serving lunch some things we could only give one big spoon till they requeued for seconds so he asked for more and I’m like not till you finish the serving I gave you. So he just stands there in the queue and eats it all then he’s like hmmm that was nice can I have some more. Anyway take a nap. We get back to our techniques and I buddy up with Simon… what a pleasant surprise. We thought the same things, had the same interests like writing and guns and sniping and indifference to football and not being a Gurupie (guru groupie) etc. Then we had the other 10 minute life story and I did that with an Italian German actress and my roommates wife. Man that couple look like twins and they’re both so docile and … special lol. I thought I’d try something different with the life story and try talk about some serious emotion, was hard to admit it but I talked about the love side of things. Dinner. Make friends with this French teen on crutches. I totally forgot to ask about his condition or get his contact. Satsang, knowledge, video, sleepiness. And we start silence! But then I had to break it coz I saw Nikita so catch up real quick… her sis Shivani is still the cutest ever man. Roommate asked if his snoring was bothering me and I was like hell yeah… I forgot my earplugs but will get some tomorrow. He was nice enough to give me his.

31st Friday 2010
Yoga… during the break it bugged me out that all these guys on silence were still using the breaks to go online on their laptops. I myself can’t get enough of the net but it was not hard at all to avoid the computer room. I mean like Enigma – Silence Must Be Heard! Anyway Kriya, book my Ayurvedic consultation. Meditations. Break… during the breaks it was usually the same… get some tea and try to get the best couch spot near the fireplace. So I’m chilling and this lady in a denim jumpsuit kinda outfit catches my eye… we go from glances, to stares, to smile… something interesting unfolds after that but I might censor that bit in the blog. Meditations. New Years eve dinner was a FEAST and sooo much cake and cookies and desserts and all sorts. Wow! And the queue went from dining hall, past the reception, past the tea room, past the corridor, down the stairs to the entrance of the Spring Hall (our meditation, yoga, etc hall). Satsang and skype it with India, party, fireworks (guruji said thats the last time he’s allowing fireworks, the neighbours can still do it but the ashram’s taking more responsibility).

1st Saturday 2011
Usual yoga, kriya routine. Brekkie. Jumpsuit lady gets me a tea ;o) I can’t stop smiling and kinda conflicted so wrote a note to the teach… something along the lines of the good news is I can’t stop smiling but it’s affecting my mental silence. See in one world I’m taught to escallate from look to touch, to hold, embrace… etc. While in AOL it’s to just be so after getting my thoughts together it was … go with the flow. Lots of hollow and empty meditations. With all that lovely food it was hard to feel hollow and empty ;oP Get in the queue for lunch then I realize I’m meant to be serving so get in my place. Seva, more meditations. Guruji sees some of the group and I knew his question would be ‘are you happy’ and then gives you a sweet/chocolate. It’s not like I’m unhappy or anything but I wasn’t gonna let him get away with it this time so I’m like ‘can I have the sweet first because my answer is not yes’. Then I handed him my note. It was a Mumukshatva thing. He’s like I’ll talk to you later but when he did get to talk to me the other group was already sitting in front of him… but anyway I’m gonna try what he said and see what happens. Folks discuss UK course prices being too high. HELLS YEAH! So I’d stopped smiling for a while after that bit and I get a note that brings it back :o) Oh then that A-hole was doing seva cleaning the toilet and he tried to make it look like he was swearing in his language kinda thing. More cakes and chocolates for the new year and some yucky tangy jam… don’t know what that was for. Dinner and washing seva… that made me realize how much folks were just eating and eating and what a huge scale operation running the ashram was… just the trough for the food making machine was crazy. Start satsang with Jumpsuit lady… from here on known as Alina but then I couldn’t sit on the ground too long and I wanted to drum away so move back. The love in this course man! It would anyway be too hard to even explain the love, joy, bliss etc… silence would explain that best ;o))))

2nd Sunday 2011
So many meditations before lunch. Alina requests eye gazing process I was gonna ask her for the same. Indian lady gave me a chocolate at lunch coz while we serve all the good stuff gets taken and I was eyes all the sweeties in the corner… very sweet of her. By now I’d moved my position in the hall and I was right under the drop down projector screen so all I had to do was lie down and see the knowledge cinema style (but in a weird perspective). This time though I slept through the knowledge… I think 1 hours worth. Usually the meditations and knowledge are so deep it happens and quite a few people were concerned that they couldn’t last through the the first 10 minutes of the meditation… but thats the process… meditation is meeting your sleep consciously. Dinner time and I was 2nd in queue so was so excited but then the main seva crew picked the first 3 and we had to help get all the food to the right serving tables etc. When I was in the kitchen I felt an intention to come back for a few weeks or months seva to see this operation and learn and all that. The head chef made this amazing olive bread man like bread with full olives in them and all sorts… genius! Finish up and have an eye gazing date with Alina. While doing it this dude took pictures of us and must have thought we were a couple coz he kept making us pose in different places and near the christmas tree. Alina and I were like we should take a picture while sitting on guruji’s couch. But it would be ‘frowned upon’ lol. Beat that djembe all satsang long… my hands were red! Oh and I did it in a ‘I NEED A BEAT’ T-shirt Viv gave me. Back to the weird snoring… I was in cloud 9 so I was laughing mostly.

3rd Monday 2011
This time we had to do yoga in pairs… it was so awkward especially coz I got a dude that didn’t wanna co-operate and then I see the 2 huge guys next to me in the same predicament. The funniest thing I’ve ever seen but at the same time realized how much the male ego can interfere. In my case I was forcing the guy to do it properly and he was like I’ll do it my way so then I was like fine I’ll just do whatever you do and entertain myself with the intertwining beasts next to me. Go for my Ayurvedic consultation… dude feels my pulse and tells me to stick my tongue out… just for a millisecond and then he’s like my constitution is so and so and just gave me a bunch of material to read and recommended some other treatments and things to buy. 40 euros for a 5 minute thing were I’m told mostly what to read and buy! It’s like some things are so hyped. Back to the processes… do the male, female model… Kevin and Keya or something like that. Go for a walk with Alina up the snowy black forest. This fluffy cat just comes and is sooo friendly… she was purring like Tasha and licking and biting my fingers. Awww moment ;o) Sit on the bench and just take the whole scene in including this angel next to me. Walk further up the hills and see some beautiful houses and trees and like Suresh, I wanna get a house there. Alina has this cute thing she does 3 sniffs in the cold. We get back to the bench to take some pics together and ask this lady to do it but she doesn’t know how to work the camera but turns out she ended up taking tons of pics. We saw some natural snowballs and the track they left forming. Names in the snow and someone didn’t exactly make a snow angel and looked like they had a big butt lol.

More meditations, we get to break the silence temporarily to say one word. Since it would be the first word it should have been significant but some folks said pizza or icecream. Hey thats what they want… I remember a time during Kriya I’d obsess about all the junk food I could eat… and womens. Yo… totally forgot one of the days we did the meditation in motion where we observe the pain and this time round I managed quite far till I cracked up. From where I was sitting I could see everyone and at one point it looked like the YMCA dance was on pose. You’re allowed to scream, cry, laugh, whatever… and boy did we crack. Dinner and some gorgeous dessert! Sit next to Alina with the djembe, the satsang was suprisingly mellow. And one lady was doing the dance class thing. Some amazing Havenu Shalom Alechem Jewish satsong! Photographer again. Now some might know there was a 2.5 million gathering for the 25 year celebrations… well now we have another one in Berlin for the 30 year celebration called World Cultural Festival (check it out http://www.worldculturefestival.org/AboutUs_AOLF.html). Watch those vids and all.
We were told not to totally break silence yet and speak only when needed… I had to speak to Alina and found out she’s not staying at the Ashram but 2km away and that she’s gonna walk alone… I offered to join but she might have taken it the wrong way and said she’s tired. But I’m like wait for a ride man… I want to chill with her and feel those extra soft hands and when she spoke… oh my lawd! Her voice, her Polish, I don’t know and don’t care what she said I just wanna hear it again and again. Chill, chit chat as little as we could and take pics and all.

4th Tuesday 2011 – Long Kriya. Breakfast. Bye Alina. Pack, bed sheets, etc. We were told to write about our experiences so I wrote 4 points. 1 – The best participants ever, 2 – Best food especially that olive bread, 3 – Pain meditation YMCA stuff, 4 – That funny pairing yoga that I never wanna see again lol. And 5 just a note to all that I’ll make a FB group for peeps to add pics and vids and link since we didn’t have enough time out of silence to catch up and chat and all. Then came the time folks are meant to come up in front and share their experiences… the dude with the funny haircut was soooo jokes. Talking about his first time and how he felt he was breathing in a cocktail of toxins that others were exhaling and the torture of being in a gas chamber. Note: I swore to my last silence buddy (Anjana) that I’d go in front but I couldn’t so my excuse is that everyone didn’t get to go coz we were out of time. Do the eye gazing process and dance and stuff. I belong to yous and chit chat. Do some filming for World Cultural Festival… we just had to say a few lines in different tones. It was weird… one director was like are you comfortable and that made me uncomfortable then the other one was like yeah just like that but more this or that. Some more of that gorgeous dessert before we split. Now the drive between the station and ashram has lots of twists and turns through hills and the drivers just zooming around shuttling us… the scary bit was they drive on the right so you’re even more freaked but it was all good. Have a satsang on the train and most folks were already chatting away… I was taking in the scenery and just took in more silence. Another train and Dorota was telling us how their satsangs are not AOL only which is the way fwd but to have that there has to be less course marketing. Get on the other train and these police with guns and all come asking for our passports and I had a mini deportation flashback but not worried at all. Bus to the airport.

Kill time for a delayed flight and we come to the interesting bit. Our cabin crew captain was gay and VERY feminine with the lisps and actions and THE WORKS. Suresh and I were sitting in front again so when the crew are strapped in they sit right opposite us. This guy sat in that cross legged position that I don’t approve of men sitting in… mostly coz I can’t do it as it ‘suffocates’ me. But the way he was sitting, his foot kept kicking me. That was one bit. The flight had 3 seats on either side of the isle. So it was Suresh, myself, french muslim mama, isle, her son or whatever, little girl and little boy. The kids were soooooo damn noisy and the mom kept blasting the dude to keep them quiet. I can’t help make faces at kids so I was making faces at the girl and that made her smile and keep quite for a while… then it did the opposite and she started crying so I just looked away when the guy turned his head to see the source of the tears lol. Back to the gay dude… I wish I recorded his voice or even him himself. So entertaining… reminds me of that gay flight attendant joke. (http://www.parasuniversal.com/2008/09/the-gay-flight-attendant-this-one-is-too-funny-to-not-forward-from-taz/) So while landing I couldn’t help overhear his convo about gay clubbing… apparently there is a word for a girl that attracts all the gays like light to bugs and how she got in a fight with a gay dude both hitting their handbags at each other and then she turns around to him asking him ‘am I winning’? Funny stuff. Land, trains…

5th Wednesday 2011 … busses home. Was soooo tempted to get a Sam’s 2 for 2 but I might as well stay in this space. Couldn’t sleep so watch Osho knowledge and stuff. And now I’m still sooo spaced I am going to have to get some rajasic and tamasic food to come down from this state.

Notes:
- Second time I’m on an AOL adventure with Suresh and we’re such a good team… like there is no judgement, conflict, politics anything. Do our thing or do stuff together it’s such an amazing space. Seeing him do the seva in the Ashram reminded me of my first 2 times… this time round I just did how much I was supposed to and a bit. Otherwise you become like seva machines… no matter how tired you are you can’t help yourself… like your body feels like it’s tired and should get rest but… just a bit more.
- Apart from that A-hole there was a hoyden in the house too and she was a teacher I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Bullying people for fireplace couches and jumping or stepping over people and all. All the Stephen Clarke French books explain French women just like her… I was like can’t be! Very funny to watch.
- I think I’m gonna make silence an yearly thing now… once every 2 years does not seem enough. Though I’ll mix it with the proper hardcore silence of Vipassana where there is no eye contact, evening satsangs or using notes to communicate.
- It’s hit me that over the years I meet soooo many people that I feel an old connection with… I didn’t realize that till Dorota sorted my registration. She’s never been to London and I don’t think we met anywhere else but I remember her unique talking style and smile. Then that Jack Johnson dude… it’s become so frequent… even this thing were I’ll think of someone out of the blue and I know I’ll either bump into them or hear from them somehow. Serious man I’m not just saying it coz I’ve been on this course… I think a lot of people are feeling that way more.
- What else… ah I better get out of this spaced-ness got bills to pay :oP

Alina Notes:
Me – You are distracting me.
Me – You look very hot! I try not to look at you otherwise I will break my silence.
Alina – When everybody were singing and dancing I wanted to dance with you!
Me – We can dance after silence. It’s going to be hard for me … we can have a dance after cake. But we have to be serious about silence after wards.
Alina – From which country you come from?
Alina – Could I have a process looking into eyes? With you? I would like you’ll see yourself in my eyes … :)
Me – I was going to ask you the same ;oP When do you want to do it? After dinner in Satsang room.
Alina – You have beautiful smile! You should smile more!
Me – Thank you.
Me (at some point) – If they have satsang now can I have a dance? If not then when we finish the course?

Never
let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humour. Here are some actual maintenance complaints submitted by UPS ‘ pilots (marked with a P) and the solutions recorded (marked with an S) by maintenance engineers.

By the way, UPS is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit
S: Something tightened in cockpit

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That’s what friction locks are for.

P: IFF inoperative in OFF mode.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you’re right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search

P: Aircraft handles funny. (I love this one!)
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

And the best one for last …
P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

Thursday 19/08/2010 – Pack, busses to link with Viv. Get some junk in our tummies. Watch Sorcerer’s Apprentice. Busses to Ameet’s listening to Vive la Fete remixes album. It’s just too good man! Ameet has guests so listen to a dentist convo. Read a pre-published version of a book.

Friday 20/08/2010 – Drive to Letchworth. Such a beautiful area man, Ameet was at work so Khushbu and I check out the area. I check into a library to send you guys the weekly blog. Langar for lunch at the local Gurudwara. Drop by a frame shop where Ameet was sorting out his and Khushbu’s wedding picture and one with Guruji in it. Read. Drive to Malvern. Hellos and all. My boy Soham has moved up from the ART Excel course to Yes! and my boy Alex moved up from Yes! to Yes! Plus. Hunt for my room… the Malvern St. James school is crazy… like the building I was staying in was a proper maze. Some of the rooms you get to through washing areas or another entrance. Glad to see some of last years ART Excel kids. Ryan hooks me up with Ferrero Rocher. Lol him and Timin remembered how much I loved chocolate. Timin’s dad had told me earlier that he’s gonna hook me up. Debrief with other teachers and assistants. Now I had also paid to do the Eternity Process so link with Katie to discuss when she can fit me in. Head ART Excel teach Su said I can’t take time off while the ART Excel course is on so Katie was like it’s better I do it during dinner and satsang as I’ll need time after that to recover. It didn’t happen but will get to it in the next few days. Hunt for food and drink. Unpack. Read.

Saturday 21/08/2010 – Had a dreamy long Kriya. Something about brekkie fruit. And something about hair mess… I think the pics will explain better. (Shit just deleted the notes about todays processes but it was the usual… meet kids, make them fill forms and make their ART Excel books). Oh yeah we played footie and Benjamin tried to score but my foot saved it but the kick was so hard it twisted my ankle right. Now I’m limping around and start hunt for pain killers, ankle support or deep heat at lunch time. Finally find Fatima… ask her to hook me up and she shows me 2 doctors. I tell the doctors my problem and here’s what they tell me… we didn’t bring anything with us so go to boots. !?!?!?! Jai hippocratic oath. I didn’t wanna bother Fatima more as her and Deepak organised the whole thing this time and they had bigger fish to fry. Everyday kids do a day chart for what we did in the morning and afternoon. Kids were hyper man… usually we don’t allow junk or chocolate but the cafeteria had hot chocolate and the kids were bouncing off the walls after lunch. Usually making them play footie or something after lunch does the trick but this time it didn’t work. Now when I saw the registrations for our course I noticed 3 brothers in the course and was like oh boy hope it doesn’t get crazy… man it was more than crazy. One bro Harrison was deaf so he needed a hearing aid and we gotta face him when speaking so he can lip read. Harrison was VERY violent and disruptive. Then there was Benjamin who has autism but what a wicked dude always high fiving everyone. Ben was like a BFG (a term I learnt there which means Big Friendly Giant). And there was Gregory who was normal and cool and stood up for Ben whenever Harrison bugged him. Harrison called Ben a retard and Ben walked off. That was not the first time… Ben, Harisson and Greg would be walking off a lot. Harrison asks me about smoking and what I smoke and stuff like that which I didn’t take too seriously till the next few days. We decide to hike up the Malverns (hills). Ria and Peter hit it off so well talking about geeky things and they were like in their on nerd world which was sooooo romantic lol. I tried to get a vid of it but the audio is not all that.

Ben runs off again and we send Ryan to get him back. One of the rules was stick with the group… as long as you can see each other you’re fine. It was so funny coz brothers Timin and Shaan wanted to go with Ryan too but Su said no and you could see them inching faster and faster till they disappeared too. So 4 kids lost… we were kinda freaked and decided to take a bit of a shortcut to see from higher ground. My ankle was killing but I managed. Oh then there was Aarjav who asked really dumbass questions just for attention and Su flipped and had a lil moment with him. Kids behaved after that. Some dude tells us that 4 kids were shouting for Su and finally we see the lost crew. They join us, have a lil discussion about responsibility etc. Ben apologised but he wanted to show he was best as he loves hiking. We all go to the top. Pics and amazing views and etc. Slip and crew up my ankle even more.

Get to class and change. Timin hooks me up with chocolates. He’s become crafty but it’s nice to see he’s entrepreneurial. Our bed had After Eight chocolates and he decided to collect them for me and says I owe him some so we negotiate. I think he’s been getting pocket money too as every time he’d be like lets go buy this and that or whatever we needed for the games and processes he’d be like we can buy it here and there. Dinner. Debrief. Note: I hardly see the other teachers or assistants sitting with the kids and for me thats when you can do some real work coz it’s smaller groups and more personal. My usual questions are what time they sleep, what they eat and what they watch and take it from there. Since it was a mega meet of courses from adults Part 1 and 2 and yoga and meditation and both the Yes! courses we all gather in the Part 2 course hall for satsang. It was such an awkward satsang. Khushbu and I kept laughing at folks fighting for the microphone just to sing a satsong nobody else was interested in singing along or that was really bad singing. Join with the kids in The Hex, which is where we do the ART Excel course and one of the rooms has a foosball, table-tennis and pool table. This time round I told the folks I’ll take care of the kids till 10 and then send them to their rooms. So did that and the kids ended up in Peter’s room making a racket with their own versions of X Factor and the like. Read. For some reason I thought I fell asleep at 12 but it was just 10.30 or something.

Sunday 22/08/2010 – Priyanka’s mom brings her dog Tonka over so kids play while my group (the Ninjas) do Saturday afternoon chart. Decide a play and sort out auditions. Ben walked out to write a whole list of plays to do which were basically movies and our criteria was 1 – a part for everyone, 2 – fitting the story in 10 minutes, 3 – realistic or something something. Play dog and the bone. Harrison walks off. Ryan tries to get him back but didn’t work and to our amazement Ryan sat down and did the Victory breath (for anger, sadness, fear). I followed Harrison and found him 3 times so those are my 3 strikes coz he walked off again. Debbie found him in a bush and I was like wow dude does not want to be found. Kids learn their Kriya (Happy breath). Now the food was not all that satvic and after a while we noticed it gave us gas big time. The good part was it was sooooo much gas that it was not vibrating bootie noisy gas it was more like blowing cigarette smoke gas. But some of the kids were leaving some very smelly ghosts. An amazing teacher from New Zealand (Parul) visits us. See I was sharing a room with Suresh and we saw Parul’s name on our room too and we’re like thats the first time they’ve mixed accommodation but thats coz someone thought Parul was a guy. She was so natural with the kids and wow the way she handled them and answered dodgy questions etc. Anyway swimming time now and I forgot my trunks so Suresh was like we’ll do it in our boxers but then Ryan hooked me up with his dads spare ones.

Do a trust walk where we blindfold one kid and another kid is entrusted to take them around kinda thing. Quick dinner so we can get back to The Hex and sort out our costumes and props for the play. Oh yeah we decided on The giraffe, pelly (Pelican) and me. Satslang? I’m sure I put slang for a reason but can’t remember but yeah once again another awkward satsang and this time quite a few of us refused to carry on we just closed our eyes and meditated while whoever was interested carried on clapping or singing. Lol we stayed silent till the song changed and then when Josh got on the mic we blew up… and just then the dude that was playing Djembe played a garba beat so I went to give him props and he handed me the chair and djembe. See some singers and DJs need to realise when theres audience participation you have to do familiar easy to follow stuff not what your favourite. Alex comes to me like ‘I’ve finally met someone that high fives more than me’ talking about Benjamin. Birthday celebrations and cake… chocolate again. I can’t believe this man we need some rules and discipline… I mean I love breaking the rules but not if it’s going to interfere with the amazing bliss you’re gonna feel. Debrief. Read.

Monday 23/08/2010 – Wake late. Oh man totally forgot to add the other mornings when my ankle was twisted the swelling was like a golf ball. Then the other bit was Suresh was amazing not only would he wait for me to go for yoga and short Kriya every morning but he was amazing with the kids and strict when needed to be. I was not please with the other two as just like the kids making their own groups these two did the same and they were more into each other than helping with the kids. It seriously felt like they didn’t exist. Sorry but thats the facts! I guess coz they were older ladies or … I don’t know just need to give myself a good excuse for why they were so passive! And today is the day I needed them most. Anyway back to the day. Miss yoga and just do Kriya and usual and I kept going into amazing trances… coz of my ankle I was sitting on a chair and would just about catch myself every time I was about to flop. Now at brekkie another thing I’d do with the kids and steal food of their plate if they were not alert or make them get me stuff or even not take too much on my plate and finish whoever couldn’t finish theirs. This time I think I wanted cocopops and was making Thomas (the cutest kid on the course) do it for me. He got up from the chair and he’s like I’m not gonna be here to do this for you all the time, you have to grow up some time! Man he was too cool… he’s from France too so we’d talk French and he’s pretty gangsta man. His mom told me the girls couldn’t make it this year but they say hi and I was like oh please talk to me some more, her accent was mesmerising. Prep for the play. And I’m even giving the lady assistants eyes to help me but they’re just AHHHHHHHH…. See I was producer of the play and getting these guys to focus for even a minute was good enough but I needed help to maintain the ones that calmed down so we could carry on. The YES! crew invite us to join them but before that we do my groups chart. Yes! crew have their own building and they don’t even join the rest for satsang… they do their own thing man. We learnt something like rocks, paper and scissors from them which was giants, wizards and elves. Play splat with them. Yes! go back while we play the 3 legged race. The cutest couple were Thomas and Priyanka coz they were the smallest and I was teaching them the trick and they’re the only ones that got it asap. Lunch. Rehearse play. Go to old peoples home to do the play, Sun salutations and sing… OH YEAH… sing! Trisha taught the kids an Italian number while I got to teach them Kalinka, a Russian number and the russian leg kicking dance. I was so jazzed about that. Get back to class and do the cut the past and shut the future process. In a way the future is more a sneaky way to tell their parents to behave themselves and sometimes parents will shout at kids and say ‘you always leave a mess’ when they should not turn it into an always thing if you know what I mean. Art Excel game which is more like British bulldog. Ben won… at one point we were trying to get Harrison and I didn’t even realise the way I’d caught him I was actually choking him. Sorry :oS. Rehearse but it’s getting crazy man and Harrison was doing his usual getting violent with folks… and with him and Ryan it was more of an alpha male thing as Ryan knew the stuff and was good at it coz of last year. This time round Ryan wasn’t having it and had to show Harrison who the boss was… I was pulling Harrison off and Su had Ryan but Ryan’s feet were closer to us and he roundhoused Harrison soooooo hard… we thought Harrison’s head would do an Exorcist on us… total silence! The only time I’ve seen a kick like that is with Yoshimitsu on Tekken. After that the other 2 brothers stuck around with Ryan and Ben was even like you’re the coolest Ryan. While Aarjav and his bro Avik stuck with Harrison and kinda entertained Harrison’s behaviour. I wasn’t surprised about Aarjav that way and it was so hard to tell the parents he was a good boy when I wanted to tell them the truth but in the end Su is the head teach and I didn’t want my say to clash with hers. I just feel for Harrison’s mom coz she was on silence and had to break it. Harrison had this attention grabbing down so well he had 6 adults giving him all the attention he wanted for a few hours and when he was fed up he was like ‘you may go now’. Anyway after a while Ryan and Harrison are buds playing sport again. Rehearse. Dinner.

Take props and costumes in the Sri Sri Yoga room and face paint kids. Chill and mess around. Oh and while we were deciding what else to present to the rest of the people there Thomas does these amazing stunts on the diabolo… check out the vid… only way to explain it. I want a kid like that! While Ryan did the caterpillar… he’s pretty good at breakdance. It’s show time so we join the rest for satsang and can’t remember the order … it was something like do a song, Thomas does his diabolo thing, do the play. Now I was backstage trying to keep things in order and all the boys were trippin over Priyanka… thing is she liked the attention. See she plays the Dukes wife and Ryan the duke and they had romantic innuendo going on too. At one point Priyanka was like she has feelings for me and I was like hey I have feelings for me too! Anyway so while these guys were going nuts back stage I had to keep them away from her and at the same time keep the cast ready for their time on stage. Then we do the Italian song and my Russian Kalinka song… I got to make the adults dance too and it gets faster and harder as the dance carries on but the adults were such good sports lol. More chocolate cake.

Debrief in Debbie’s… man she had a room and a half… since it was a girls school we got the girls rooms which were pretty big and had like 3 spare beds and what not but Debbie’s looked like a teacher room with micro, oven, tv, kettle… basically a house in the building! Talk and we were told Carolina donated her money so that some of the kids could do the course for free. Props! And Debbie describes her as a blond Angelina Jolie too! Guruji has agreed for the course fees to be reduced for ART Excel. Just hope UK Board hook it up. Pack and chat with Suresh… he shows me a vid of Guruji’s visit with someone in MTV and Guruji is shooting at someone with something like giant paintballs and then goes for a ride in a Smart car version of a Formula 1. And in the end the driver is stuck with his seatbelt so Guruji’s like here let me release you and frees the guy. Might put it up on here.

Tuesday 24/08/2010 – Man there was this white pigeon or dove thing just chillin with eyes closed so I thought I’d go chill with it and it didn’t even wake up or anything so I started petting it and it didn’t realise till after a while, woke up and just tried to walk away a few steps to avoid my hand so I moved closer and it just wont run away or fly away… ended up hiding inside a bush. That was yesterday… today tried to wake it up and poor thing just stayed still. RIP white pigeon dove thing. Anyway so Soham and Vatsal hook me up with a mocha latte. Simona came over to our class to play the violin for the kids… can’t believe some of the kids remembered from last year that the string thing was made from horse hair. And this other dude did some acting thing… wasn’t paying attention and didn’t even get to take vids or pics coz I was helping with the charts that were still left to do. Parents come over to see what we’ve been teaching the kids and show that youtube of when the kid silenced the world. Parents leave, do the painting meditation and this time we got to do our own drawings or paintings too. Around this time I tell Ria what I do and she was so interested and kept asking me or telling me what she does and how she takes pictures of her sis and edits them etc… I was like wow you sound like you really enjoy it so keep doing it. If you were in London I’d have talked to your folks about giving you Photoshop lessons. Snacks and drinks. Now everyday the school staff would bring like 2 crates of fruit with cereal bars and 4 packs of juice. But no one was having it apart from me… I know it was for the students but they weren’t having it and one of my rules is ‘be shameless when it comes to food’. So my pockets always had cereal bars and well I was drinking enough water but whenever I got bored … there was the juice! ;o) Play heroes and compliments but some of the kids weren’t having it… by the end of it I realised one of the boys that had stayed in the background was really the best one in the class, so big up Peter. I mean Ryan was my inside man this year since Soham moved to Yes! and Thomas my stepson :oP Lunch. Goodbyes. Get props from Ben, Greg and Harrison’s mom, Thomas’ mom, Timin and Shaan’s pops and Priyanka’s mom. It was so weird coz when we start the course we have to sign this crap about not being alone with kids without parents around or something and no holding them so I guess the others were being cautious but I didn’t care man… kids need as much affection, love and nurturing as they can get. Like those few moments when the shy ones get out of their shell… it’s so amazing to see them blossom and you need to be off your guard for that to happen because thats the best time to remind them how much they can shine. I remember Moksha (already an amazing name) was shy and even though she made friends easily she was different. Her accent and pronunciations and in a way buggin with repeating the same stuff or questions but when she let her guard down one lunch time I told her to be aware of how great she’s feeling at that moment and not to let the kids bug her out. Kids can be brutally honest and sometimes it gets much right but use that same freedom they’re using to be you kinda thing. Ok I’ll stop ranting.

Help Katie pack… I’ll be going back to hers for the Eternity Process since we didn’t get to do it there. Beata and Miho will be following us and they get some water from the source. Drop by organic food shop and Katie is hungry as hell. I was just plain tired. Along the way back some weird stuff happened and I’m sure Katie was doing it. See when I sleep sometimes I jerk but just lil ones here and there. Then I did the Sahaj Samadhi meditation with Su and during the meditation I got big jerks and Su explained that impressions were being released. So I got used to that… but in the car this time round I was getting JERKS! Like such gangsta spasms my hands nearly hit the roof of the car. More than twice this happened so I kinda freaked out and stayed awake. I don’t even know why I freaked out coz releasing impressions is a good thing. Aaaaanywho… Get to Katie’s and what a magical place. Again part of me freaked out coz add this up… a lovely charming sweatheart of a lady living in the country side in a very old but well maintain house, amazingly big garden that joins onto a field with sheep etc. You know those magical Narnia kinda stories where you’re so charmed by everything it feels like too good to be true and imagine you’re gonna be locked up any second so that you can be fed to be plumped up just so you can be the meal (for those that don’t get it … Hansel and Gretle). So yeah that flashed my mind for a second but then again I was charmed by the plums and berries and apples and artichokes growing in her garden. Swing bench. Forget all that… I didn’t even know how gorgeous an artichoke flower looks. You know me and trees so the trees def did it for me… and there was this one tree that had spikes but the spikes on the end of each stem changes colour (pics will tell a better story). Su comes over to leave her bike and stuff while she’s in Italy. We have dinner and stories etc. Su leaves and Gordon starts playing guitar. We start having a satsang and Katie gives us pots, pans, spoons etc to play percussion. Have so much fun and laughs. Crazy dreams. Note: I have a feeling some folks have been doing long Kriya more than once a week, the symptoms are there! Lol.

Wednesday 25/08/2010 – Wake up and Katie and Beata gang up on me about the walls I’ve put up and … well the rest is for my private notes ;oP but wow Beata read my energy so well she even said stuff I’ve thought about and discussed only with Twinx, Taz and Nikita. We decide I was not ready for the Eternity Process till after I get regular with my short Kriya and instead Beata works on me with some other stuff and wow she pinched the hell out of the flesh on my lower back… I don’t know what she did but she’s like after I’ve finished stay lying down for a while and get up when you’re ready… I was not ready for a longgg time man… and after that as I type I’m still in a bit of a daze. Then again the stuff she told me kinda blew my mind too. And she kept wishing me happy birthday so I guess it was like a rebirth or something? Hell to celebrate that change I was planning on chopping my hair off but I still have plans for that. Oh and speaking of change, you know how you see signs… check this out… my main man Naruto changes the world in the episode that will be out tomorrow. Was listening to Eminem’s new album and he’s flipped the script on us too which was really nice … hell he’s even got a song called Going Through Changes or something like that. This book I’ve been reading has been an answer to the questions I’ve had and about crazy changes or like the knowledge in there was just so timely it was like…. wow. Anyway so since I’ve been good for these days I’ve decided to carry on with practices and see how much longer I can stop meat this year. I just hate telling folks I’ve stopped coz thats right about the time when I start again kinda thing and … I better finish this blog coz it’s getting late.

So … next …. Katie had been telling me about Biodynamics which is a step higher than organic food and stuff… I’ll try post that next to this post so you can check it out. Took info on other stuff like why Ghee is so good etc. Her area has a few places that do that, her area has a lot of Scientolog-ists too. So get back to hers after shopping at one of these places. I see a deer in the back and try to get a pic of it but I have a face and they recognise that as a threat I guess. Ayurvedic cooking. Katie does my numerology and again another sign. Not only that but the repeating numbers. 17.17, 8.8. Over heard Gordon on the phone talking about Prison SMART and that’s something I wanted to get into and since Viv started work in prisons I was just discussing that with him the week before! Catch the train to London, back in the crowd and city life and noise at home. Still so dazed it didn’t matter. Hell all I did tomorrow was float with a weird headache spending time with my lappy. Note: I’m starting to like the tense of the last sentence as I’m writing about tomorrow which would in this current moment be the past. Gotta explore that ;o) Jai Gurudev.