New Rules: Polite Musings from a Timid Observer by Bill Maher
This book has been the funniest I’ve come across in a long time. But it’s not only jokes, it really has new rules about life and especially politics. The rules start with a genius pun for headings and go alphabetically through the book. Note: If you get the audiobook you will miss out on the pictures but you get the benefit of listening to Bill saying the rules himself and I think if you just read the book without knowing how he speaks… you’re missing out a lot already.
Of of my favourite rules… New Rule: The big oil companies must stop running ads telling us how much they’re doing for the environment. We get it: You rape the Earth, but you cuddle afterward. It’s insulting – like a serial killer dumping a body by the roadside and then adopting a highway. If you folks at Shell really are serious about cleaning something up, start with your restrooms.
The rules are funny, the pictures are funny but they all make some good points. I just found out there is a DVD too… yay! Big up Navjit for the excellent recommendation.
Update: Just finished reading the sequel The New New Rules: A Funny Look at How Everybody but Me Has Their Head Up Their Ass. Same style, same topics and pretty much same funniness. (Audio book below)
I’m sending these graphic pictures of overdose victims not for shock value, but rather in the hope that you will have a frank discussion with friends and family about respecting moderation, understanding limits, and knowing when to just walk away.
Awesome Street Art : 3D Optical illusion by Kurt Wenner
A new book collects the 3D street art of Kurt Wenner, a former NASA employee, who uses his mathematical skill to create three-dimensional illusions on pavements across the world.
When viewed from the correct angle, people standing on top of them look like they are floating in thin air, and solid concrete can look like gaping chasms. Kurt has been perfecting his technique since 1982. Now, using the skills he has perfected over 30 years, he is able to create stereoscopic images, such as the one above enabling people to walk along imaginary webs slung by Spiderman.
street art – spiderman
For 25 years the artist has been using complex calculations from his old job – creating conceptual drawings of extraterrestrial landscapes at NASA – to bring floors and walls to life. Because of the emergence of computer-generated images, he was one of the very last artists to be trained how to mechanically replicate perspectives using pencil and paper and complex equations. But in 1982 he turned his back on space projects and, after selling all his belongings, moved from the USA to Italy where he applied his knowledge to art.
Perfect 3d art
He says: “The pieces look real because they are calculated to be perfectly and mathematically accurate. It’s exactly how they would look if the objects in my paintings were actually there. I use a piece of string to measure fixed points between the viewing location and the painting. This lets me calculate exactly how the perspective should be. It takes me around five to seven days to complete an average sized piece.
Art:Combination of world
This was the first interactive 3D street painting, combining real people with their painted reflections. It was created during a street painting festival for a Swiss-German documentary in 1987 at Grazie Di Curtatone, Italy
Awesome Street painting :3d
A Door to the Caribbean in New York City, April 2011. The pavement in front of the New York Stock Exchange was transformed into a luxury cruise ship, transporting the public to exotic destinations
3d art:cruise ship and luxury door
The three magi bring gifts to the children of Queretaro, Mexico, in December 2010
Street art : Celebration
The Woman Driver in Bahrain, March 2008. This illusion of an F1 racecar had a hole cut out for the public to sit in and pose for pictures.
3d art: Lady Driver
This work was created in Rome in March 2008 to celebrate the 500th anniversary of Leonardo da Vinci’s arrival in Milan
Perfect art : Leonardo da Vinci
Cyclist Bradley Wiggins leaves the Southbank for a ride through the rainforest, on a work called A Forest Path, October 2010
Street art : Forest path
Kurt sits on a work called The Armchair Traveller in Waterloo Station, London, in January 2010
Street art : Expressions
The Moneypit in Waterloo Station, October 2008. This image, showing a bank guard standing over a pit of banknotes, was the first stereoscopic work of pavement art ever created with Colorcode glasses.
Money on street : perfect art
An early 3D anamorphic work in Lucerne, Switzerland, 1985
This is one of three interactive pavement art pieces commissioned for Buick motor company in 2009 in Herald Square in New York
Great interactive art:Herald Square in New York.
A model of the Herald Square work. The pavement art was combined with a vertical panel for extra height, to take advantage of the limited space
Great model art of the Herald Square work.
Luxury way to the world of art.
Amazing art-Great ride.
Aqua Panna at the V Wine Cellars in Napa, California.
Awesome art: Acqua panna
A drawing for a piece of 3D art of a dragon in 2010 in Taiwan.
Best 3D Art: Dragon
A Million Signatures in Brussels, Belgium, in November 2010. The European Commission was presented with a million signatures requesting further study of genetically modified crops.
NASA astronaut Douglas Wheelock who is currently aboard the International Space Station shares pictures of the Earth he snaps with the world through Twitter. Known to his nearly 68,000 Twitter followers as Astro_Wheels, Wheelock has been posting impressive photos of the Earth and some of his thoughts ever since he moved into the space station in June, five months after it got Internet access. Needless to say, the pictures are stunning.
Here is a small collection of some of his best pictures. If you find these interesting, you should really checkout his Twitter page.
Greek islands on a clear night during our flight over Europe. Athens shine brightly along the Mediterranean Sea. Unreal feeling arises when one sees the beauty of the ancient earth from space.
‘Mystery Island’ …located in the Indian Ocean close to Madagascar. Interesting features on the island and the unusual shape should be enough to help you discover this beautiful place.
Northern lights in the distance in one of the finest nights over Europe. The photo clearly shows the Strait of Dover. Paris is dazzling with the city lights. A little fog over the western part of England, particularly over London.
The moon is breathtaking
Of all the places of our beautiful planet few can rival the beauty and richness of colors in the Bahamas. In this photo, our ship is seen against the backdrop of the Bahamas.
At a speed of 28,163 kilometers per hour (8 kilometers per second), we rotate the Earth’s orbit, making one revolution every 90 minutes, and watch sunsets and sunrises every 45 minutes. So half of our journey is in darkness. For the work we use lights on our helmets.
Every time I look out the window and see our beautiful planet, my soul sings! I see blue skies, white clouds and bright blessed day.
Another spectacular sunset. We see 16 such sunsets each day, and each of them is really valuable.
Beautiful atoll in the Pacific Ocean, photographed using 400mm lens. Approximately 1930 km south of Honolulu.
Perfect reflection of sunlight in the eastern Mediterranean.
Above the center of the Atlantic Ocean, before another stunning sunset. Downstairs in the setting sun visible spiral Hurricane Earl.
A little farther east, we saw a sacred monolith Uluru, better known as Ayers Rock Rock. I have never had the opportunity to visit Australia, but someday I hope that I will stand by this miracle of nature.
Morning over the Andes in South America. I do not know for sure the title of this peak, but was simply amazed by her magic, stretching to the sun and wind tops.
Over the Sahara desert, approaching the ancient lands and thousand-year history. River Nile flows through Egypt by the Pyramids of Giza in Cairo. Further, the Red Sea, Sinai Peninsula, Dead Sea, Jordan River, as well as the island of Cyprus in the Mediterranean Sea and Greece on the horizon.
Night view of the River Nile, stretching like a snake through Egypt to the Mediterranean, and Cairo, located in the Delta. Far away in this picture, one can see the Mediterranean Sea.
Our unmanned ‘Progress 39P’ approaches to the ISS for refueling. It is full of food, fuel, spare parts and all necessities for our station. Inside was a real gift – fresh fruit and vegetables. What a miracle after three months of food from a tube!
I wanted to share with you this view from the Dome. We said goodbye to the members of our group Sasha, Misha and Tracy this weekend, and they returned safely back to Earth. In this photo, Tracy quietly dreams of returning home.
Module Union 23C Olympus docked with the ISS . When our work ends here, we go back home to Earth. We fly over the snow-capped peaks of the Caucasus. The rising sun is reflected from the Caspian Sea.
The flash of color, movement and life on the canvas of our amazing world. This is part of the Great Barrier Reef off the east coast of Australia, photographed through the lens of 1200 mm.
All the beauty of Italy, a clear summer night. You can see many beautiful islands that adorn the coast – Capri, Sicily and Malta. Naples and Mount Vesuvius are allocated along the coast.
At the southern end of South America lies the pearl of Patagonia. The amazing beauty of rugged mountains, massive glaciers, fjords and seas combined in perfect harmony.
“Dome” on the side of nadir station gives a panoramic view of our beautiful planet. Fedor made the picture from the window of the Russian docking compartment. In this photo I’m sitting in the dome, preparing the camera for our evening flight over Hurricane Earl.
Florida and southeastern U.S. in the evening. A clear autumn evening, the moonlight over the water and sky, dotted with millions of stars.
Clear starry night over the eastern Mediterranean. The ancient land with a thousand years of history stretching from Athens to Cairo. Historical land of fabulous and alluring island … Athens – Crete – Rhodes – Izmir – Ankara – Cyprus – Damascus – Beirut – Haifa – Amman – Tel Aviv – Jerusalem – Cairo – all of them turned into tiny lights in this cool November night.
In this time of year you can enjoy the beauty of the polar mesospheric clouds. With our high-angle illumination, we were able to capture a thin layer of noctilucent clouds at sunset.
Monday 7th 2011
Meditate, busses to Brent Cross, McMuffin, Dump, Bus to Airport, Boarding. Review weekend madness… Basically got a Bulgarian couple as housemates. And Pepi decided to have a girls party. Made curtain doors and loads of food etc. I end up joining them coz I won’t be able to sleep with the music next door. Glad Nahom joined too coz it was his last few days here. George joins us late and blows our minds with b-boy moves. Old and quiet dude just after his evening vodka and football normally. I got drunk enough to give away quite a few of my hats and woke up the next day thinking maybe I gave out 2 too many. I think Nahom returned one of them. Anyway… Mp3 Player battery dies so kill time browsing the shops at the gates. Find internet which costs 10 quid a minute! Wasn’t planning to browse just charge my Mp3 player but ended up giving in to 10 minutes of temptation. Sleep through the flight. Land in Warsaw and see my baby Alina and meet her homeboy Tomek. 3 hour drive to Lublin. Get home and I’m glad to see a gym close by. Alina stays on the top floor of her rise so get a good leg workout anyway. Eat ashram food. Cuddle.
Tuesday 8th 2011
Get woken up by my alarm which is the chorus of Kanye West’s Gorgeous. Do our short Kriya and have some interesting horseradish sandwiches. Take a bus to this frozen lake called Zalew Zegrzyński. Folks were ice fishing and we took a long romantic walk till the path got slippery and we got tired. Along the walk there was first play area with watersides and all. Not open in the cold season but one of the slides looked so funny. The pic can explain it best. Then the second play area was more to my liking. It had these ‘rides’ which were more like gyms and the mechanics were so well thought… you use your own body weight to do stuff like bench press, leg press, shoulder press, cross trainer, waist twists, etc. I have a vid of Alina on one of them and she looks so cute on it. Note: Lots and lots of crows around and I noticed Lublin is pretty dry and open spaced. Reminds me of South C, Nairobi.
Rest and take a long walk to her sisters. Alina loves her tea so we had that and I finished all the cheese and whatever else I could get my hands on. Later the sis called her and she was mad… I thought it was about the food but it was about the house. I was too hungry to think of the house. I personally liked it. Their houses are colourful, SPACIOUS, and cheap. So during the day I noticed a lot of flower sellers and folks carrying them around. Aparently it’s like Valentines day for them. Dzień Kobiet/Women’s Day – a tribute to the struggle of victims for gender equality kinda thing. Alina says I’m a phenomenon coz everybody especially old folks were staring at me.
So this drunk dude gets on the bus. I’m sitting opposite the door and he’s standing there facing me and I can feel his eyes. You know how I attract these folks so I was wondering how long it’ll take for him to sit opposite me. He did and started talking to me. Alina was telling him to leave me alone, I’m a visitor and I don’t understand the language. He’d behave for 20 seconds and then start again. So he was like peace and wanted to know where I’m from. Just picture a drunk happy dude mesmerised by this darker skinned dude. Once I told him I’m from Kenya he went nuts. Now I personally don’t mind shaking dirty hands but the rest of the bus was like ‘is this guy for real?’. He kept shaking my hand and I kept giving him the Rasta dap style greeting. He’s like I really wanna go to Kenya etc. When we got of the bus Alina told me she attracts these kinda folks too. Our lives are always interesting thats for sure.
Get a universal plug coz I forgot about European sockets. Alina does massage, reiki, energy stuff so I finally got the decent massage I needed. All the others were too soft. Note: For her size… lady is strong! She even made me sleep on some spikes that felt like fire on my back. Knockout. Felt so good after I wanted to skip the Gong Concert she’s planned for us. And luck would have it… we missed the bus so walk back home. My tooth started acting up so took some powerful painkillers. (…).
Wednesday 9th 2011
Sing Az Yet’s Arrow Through My Heart for my baby to wake up to. ;o))) Yes I’m trippin on love baby! More on that later. Short Kriya. Bus to city and bus to a beautiful place called Nałęczów. Where we went swimming, steaming, saunaing, hot-tubbing and had a mud/clay bath. Which looked and felt so good I wanted to drink it. The pool there was so wicked it had all these different sections with jets of water for your back, another one to sleep on, another section for the feet and my favorite… the waterfall. Rest and have some tea. Eat at this amazing restaurant at Hotel Przepióreczka. Excellent pork dish. Walk around shops and Alina chose a lil present for me. And then we do this salt cave aromatherapy thing. I don’t know if it was the swimming and food before but I knocked out again. Been very meditative so far. This was at the hotel too and it’s called Jaskinia Solna. Pics and vids shall explain. Get back and I wanna rip Alina’s cd’s to mp3s before I leave but have issues with iTunes coz my Polish is not so polished. (…) talk.
Thursday 10th 2011
Can’t remember what song I sang her but the rituals were I sing her songs in the morning and make her tea after every meal. And of course do the dishes coz I just love it so! And no I’m not being sarcastic. I love it so much I even have preference for the sink to be on the right, draining/drying area on the left etc. All she’s missing is the dish drainer. Anyway wake up late. Breakfast in bed. Gym. Spag bol. Get a different kind of energy massage that TOTALLY knocked me the hell out! Tomek picks us up for satsang and Kriya. Jagoda is also in the car and she’s ogling me. I’m told she’s a man hunter lol. Tomek started reminding me of Anup, heartbreaking coz of his wife and boss but heartwarming coz Alina has such and amazing person as a friend … Anup story here (https://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=4146916817). The satsang was different… no clapping or clicking. Kriya was good times but funny at one point coz this dog outside started barking and coz it echoed he was like barking at himself. Folks give out biscuits, cakes, and chocolatey yummies!
Staring… we do this a lot on skype too. Getting lost in each others eyes… I’m in love man! Some note about blue? So there’s more uses for olive oil apart from cooking! (…). Then we talk (…) and she said I was like a dentist. So I just said ‘where is my phone’ (to make a note). And that triggered her to laugh for what felt like the whole night. We laughed sooo much she got hungry in the middle of the night so I keep running to the kitchen to feed her sandwiches, avocado, nutella, etc.
Friday 11th 2011
Awkward kriya. Now I had to get my boarding pass printed so Alina gave me a pen drive. I copied the stuff and mailed the pdf to our emails too. But the pen drive I placed on the desk coz we’d be taking it today and Alina saw it there to. It vanished! Buses to city, print boarding pass from email, more people staring. And I was like where are all the Indian, Chinese and African people especially Nigerians. Coz these 3 can be found in any nook and cranny in the world. Finally see some Chinese. Share a meal at Cleopatras… very funky place with related interior design.
Go to the church/cathedral where Alina used to be in the choir – Katedra Matki Bożej Płaczącej. Blew my mind! I was already amazed by the entrance so took a vid and she’s like there’ll be more… I was thinking how much more as in might be a little more. There was a 1000 times more! The pictures don’t do the place justice and I felt dodgy pointing my camera everywhere. The pipe organ looked like a little building itself! After being amazed, I started looking for Freemasonry and Illuminati signs… you’ll see them for yourself in the pics.
I’d been craving Tiramisu so Alina took me to another amazing restaurant… looked more like a community catacomb. So big, so many rooms. We finally decided on a very romantic corner and I don’t know if Alina was tickling me or what but I laughed that laugh were you let our a mini raspberry of fart. Was definitely not sure if were long enough in the relationship for body sounds. As it is my stomach makes noise and when I say noise I mean loud noise so holding in the gas didn’t help the situation. Decide to let some out while she was on the phone and I ended up stuck in the loo coz someone switched off the lights!
Do some shopping for home… Alina wanted to try out some fish and I had to get some sausages for Viv and found Sneakers Cruncher!!! One of my favourite rare chocolates. Busses back. Alina tells me about hand me downs and I was like me too! She tells me other stuff too and I can’t help what I’m feeling. I’m falling for this lady and for once I don’t do it with my guard up or anything. I’m starting to feel mentally and emotionally naked and I don’t care. Rest. Find the pen drive under the mouse mat.
More shopping, more people staring, more chinese people and an Indian or well tanned Italian. Even I was staring at him lol. Reminds me of Russell Peters’ joke about Indians seeing other Indians. Finally get to rip Alina’s cd’s. Have a dance and Alina’s soooo cute… her big beautiful head orbiting around mine side to side. (…), she gets hungry for fruit. More fun, laughs and eating. Laughing fits till…
Saturday 12th 2011
…now. More fruit. Get some beautiful pics of her. Might not share those here. (…). I love the way she meows and does these sound effects. Laugh like crazy with that too. And get a recording later. Go to city and Alina takes me for her yoga class. Now I do that often enough to feel confident enough to do whatever comes my way. OUCH! Advanced yoga man. From the first posture I was like what the flex have I got myself into! We kept doing the downward facing dog and touching toes after most poses but gaaaaad dayum! And when it came to the postures I could do Tom was like I don’t think you can and even if you can I don’t want you to have neck and back pain later. Sheesh! But he was a great instructor. Maybe not the best choice with the dolphin shorts but he took care of me. At one point he was showing us an example of a difficult posture and stretched so much he let one rip. Finish and make our way to get some sweets for Maha Satsang. Note: I love my Lipton iced teas and got to try a new red tea one. Window shop and get stares… then I see 2 indian rudeboys roaming around the shopping centre in vests. Interesting.
I’m telling you man this place is so like Kenya. The streets, buildings, shops, kiosks, markets. Go to the market and Alina gets like 3 cakes and I’m like I wanna take something too so I got some chocolate biscuits. Then she had to meet a teacher that was coming down from elsewhere so she sent me home. (…) roof. Ahem. Get to the Gym and it’s packed today… some filming in the squash courts. And what is a woman doing in the mens changing rooms?! Get home and rest on the floor where we usually rest and do our kriya and start thinking of what Alina told me the other day. I was getting a lump in my throat from so much love. I want to be her hero, I want to leave everything to live with her. And she lives such a simple life, bare necessities, no TV at home. I don’t watch TV anyway but like… this is the one! I took a sankalpa to have a future with her. I AM going to be her hero. I AM her hero! I nearly had tears. Then sleep on the bed and when I wake up it’s late and I’m missing her, I’m worried. I want her back. When she came back I couldn’t tell her in words so I tried in actions… didn’t work so I do what we did when we first met at the ashram. Silence and eyes. (…).
Had to get bread from the shopping centre so even surprised her with a dish drainer. She’s into her blues so got that. I was still pretty tired from gym and yoga so rest while she coordinates the AOL Maha Satsang stuff. New ‘pyjamas’ ;o). (…) yoga poses. (…). The thing is we can talk if we have to say something. We were both too tired so sleep.
Sunday 13th 2011
(…). Make her brekkie while she gets ready for the big day. Coordinate suitcase. Pack for AOL. Taxi to the hotel. Set up. I’m on the Guruji pic, cakes, fruit, curtains, sound, projector, etc. Alina’s on the bigger stuff. After all my cutting, arranging and rearranging and setting up I knew someone would change it and out of everyone it had to be the one person that introduced themselves to me as Ela (kinda reminded me of Jude Law). The rest either didn’t know English too well or we’re busy catching up etc. Ela does the guru puja. Sound guys come in and set up, sound check, etc.
My bootie is in pain, I blame the hard core yoga. We do some more yoga and processes. One process involved a simon says kinda thing where the teach would be like left hand… so everyone touches their left hand with someone else’s left hand. All in Polish so Marzena explained what we roughly have to do. So when the guy said butt… instead of me touching my butt against someone elses I ended up grabbing this dude’s. Luckily it was too fast a game and every time we had to choose a different partner. Funny thing is buttock is one word I did learn in Polish since I am a bootie person and I can’t keep my hands of my baby’s bootie. Note: That’s another thing… I’m doing things I don’t usually do or they’re not me or breaking like my rules. 3 Main ones are – 1: Absolutely no overseas relationships, 2: No relationships with non-english speakers and 3: (…)! So anyway my point is because most couples call each other baby I found it stereotypical and cheesy but I’m doing it myself now!
Back to AOL … do a guided Short Kriya. I was so gone I kept like nearly falling off the chair. Food. Meet a gujarati uncle from Uganda – Rajesh. He ends up lecturing me on not speaking Guju so well so I find an excuse to bail and get my baby dessert and tea. Alina introduces me to Marzena and we talk about assisting in ART Excel and this movie like love story. This girl has so much love in her eyes when she talks about the kids or deep stuff and I feel like she’s gonna break down into tears any moment now. Now everybody all over the world was going to get on skype with Guruji for the Maha Satsang but apparently everyone in the whole of Poland could not get their webcast to work.
Have a satsang. Get the picture of Tomek, Alina and myself that I wanted. Think about Tomek again and this is when I really feel for him and tell Alina about it. Clean up. Rajesh plays a video about Uganda hospital but the connection is not good so just see half the vid. Later he gets a blasting for meddling. Pack and clean. Long Kriya teach drops us. Tell Alina about Anup. Then chill and chat about making a future and what our possibilities are. Back pain like crazy so Alina sorts that out. (…). She’s so fucking sweet and sexy (…) it’s sooooo damn sweet!
Monday 14th 2011
(…). She’s not feeling well so we sleep. Wake up, order pizza, eat, sleep. (…).
Tuesday 15th 2011
Sleep till 1.45am. Yeah I was over excited and booked a flight for 6am instead of pm. Robert picks us and Tomek lent him the nice new car he got his wife. Weird ride… I was between sleep, feeling weird for leaving, trying to stay positive and eating and tea. Robert takes me round some Palace in Warsaw. Police stop him to give him a breathalyzer test. All good. Airport. Now in a way I’m glad we didn’t have a sad goodbye but it sure was funny. Robert was so in my face I felt like he was my partner … mostly being helpful and trying to speak whatever English he knew. I wanted to tell him to go away but poor guy woke up to drive me 3 hours to the airport in the middle of the night. Anyway later I found out Alina lectured him all the way home hahaaaaa… glad I wasn’t on the ride back… well if I was she wouldn’t… ah you know what I mean.
Grrr… this law of attraction/what you resist persist rule is pissing me off man! Be it cinemas, busses, trains, planes… I get some fucking fidgety shit head that can’t sit properly behind me and keeps bumping my seat. Not only did this fool keep doing that the whole flight but he even compromised my legroom by putting his suitcase under my seat. His was the last row so it’s understandable he was pretty squashed but come on! There’s at least a place for the bag overhead! I’m just happy I was too tired to let it get the best of me and slept it off. The landing was scary coz I could feel us getting closer to land and could not see the ground coz of the fog up until we nearly hit ground. One person does the clap after landing thing. Our plane had to wait a long time for some reason before letting us off. Look at my booking for my bus to Brent Cross and see the time… I’m 5 minutes late! How can this be… I plan each step to have at least 45 minutes extra time! My phone says 9am, bus dude says wait 15 minutes and I’ll get you on an earlier one. Then it hit me… I was still on Poland time… I can relax my sphincter. Phew.
Weird though coz in Poland my phone changed time automatically but here it didn’t change back. By the time I get to Walthamstow my bladder is exploding… glad they have loos. This Chinese guy has what looks like a chocolate loaf of bread and he’s munching away. Sits next to a hot chick and says something but she’s like brushing him off. He carries on eating. Which reminds me I better get some food for home and Asda Chocolate Brownies for Neha. They are the best ones I’ve tired so far… moist, soft, melt in your mouth. Unpack, washing, Medal of Honour. Meet new housemate Yuri from Estonia or something… got lots in common… gaming, bunnin… he’s a waiter and he has Adobe CS5!!!! Oh and Alina got me a box of dried prune chocolates from Naleczowska which I nearly finished. Saved like 3 for later. Ended up taking it out of the chocolate brownies… sorry Neha ;oP There’s still half left. Skype with my baby and feel much better. (…). Can’t remember what else… oh yeah… I’m so in love even the cheesy songs are starting to make sense.