First day – was good. Usual set up, name games and what not. Funny bit was when we brought up the topic for plays one kid said Holly Oaks. Mostly they’re Somali kids with one action packed white kid and one Indian looking one. Most of them have been divided into like 3-4 kids per assistant and we all got our own difficult ones. I’d spotted mine (Yusuf) even before he was assigned to me but he’s not that bad, I just can’t tell him what to do so I challenge him instead and when it comes to the important stuff like yoga and meditations and breathing he’s good. Then there was the 3 legged race and these two girls had the best coordination man. One two one two one two… till the end… and they were the the smallest ones there. They won the second time too so yeah I’m backing them for races lol. I’m was still drained from crashing at Viv’s then Sag’s and all the partying and stuff. Marco’s not sorted out the net at home so I think facechoons and mails might be out of the question this week. Got so much to sort out and I’m worried by the time I get home the cybercafe’s and post offices are gonna be closed. Anyway go with the flow… just glad to be doing ART Excel… needed a unique distraction and well… here it is.

Day 2 – Started out good. Got my sleep so I was ready. Looked for a post office since I was early but didn’t find one. Ended up buying Krave, new cereal Viv and I’d been wanting to try. See one of the kids there and she says she’s not coming in today… find out coz it was her birthday. Played catch till all the kids were in… Zurha’s getting violent and wild but we’re tight now coz of that. For some reason she understands me… well not for some reason… I can identify so it was easier for me to explain it to her. Anyway today Egli and Lukhman were even more out of order and they got to Joshua. That way my kids are good, Yusuf want’s to be left the hell alone while Zurha wants to do the opposite so instead of saying do this I have to praise Abdulahi and she’s try to compete. Abdulahi loves his meditation man… a bit too much… sometimes does it when he’s not meant to. Today they learnt the happy breath (Kriya) and played extra sport after lunch. Was pretty wild… oh and Carolina joined us. Today’s main bit was having to spend extra time with Zurha for getting physical with Amira and 2 other girls. It’s kinda helping me too but we’ll talk about that in later days to come. Oh and then get home to Bacco and Delton bitching about Kent being gay. Now I’ve heard them bitching to bond before but it aint my style. First of all we not sure about Kent, second what does it matter and third… who wants to talk about who’s gay and how many women they’re pimpin? What are you going to do with that information? In fact I got a small thought on that I’ll publish soon on my replies to sexuality.

Day 3 – Used to call day 3 crack day coz thats when the breathing and yoga breaks the kids down. And coz of these kids backgrounds there so sooo much swearing, kicking and just… oh man… all the teachers lost it at least once. I lost it and kinda swore too which was not cool but it got their attention. Bit up Shobna, Nayla and Sarojben for the lovely food and cake. What else… Zuhra loves her fights and most of the time I’m chasing her around to behave or stick with class… at one point she nearly walked out all packed but it was more to get my attention so later I had to stop giving her so much. Thing is my other kids are too cool… Abdulahi is a gem and Yusuf may have the attitude of a hoochie but he’s good people. Oh yeah Joshua sent the ball flying to my head from one end of the goal to the other so had to pause and get my bearings back. Oh and the kids were even kicking me… Rahma especially… she reminds me of Kanye. The debriefings are starting to take long after the kids have left and I got urgent things to do!!! Anyway before that I needed up bumping into the wildest kid Egli and he was doing what he loves best… football. Today I talked a lot about Naruto with the kids coz they understand that better so I explained mostly to Zurha and later Egli that this breathing is like Naruto’s training where he does not like to do his training but in the end he’s sworn never to give up and now he likes it coz he knows how to use chakra and jutsus etc. They were really curious why we teach for free and end up paying on our side so I was like once I found how much chakra I can get and use it for my powers I feel like I want everyone to feel it too. Lets see tomorrow if Egli gets it. Today was rough and as much as I agree with Joshua about useing a cattle prod tomorrow lol (just joking), but he’s doing him. One of the assistant teachers was getting on my nerves for being so negative and not giving kids a chance, like the last thing they wanna hear is another adult constantly telling them not to do things and pointing out their mistakes. But hey I was doing me so it’s all good. I also feel Mrudula should get more props AND responsibilites. But that kinda seems political or punish and reward or something. Oh yeah my kids were really good with their practices today too coz whoever was good got prizes for breathing, honesty, being helpful etc. The breathings got me feeling things too but like I said that’s for later. So yeah debriefing, sort out urgent postage. And some unwind time.

Day 4 – Got lots done. Lots of games. The blindfold one was too funny coz Aaron was not looking where he was taking his blindfold dude and dude walked into the gate. Then there was Ramla and Yasir… Ramla and I was cracking up coz Yasir took extra time to hold sticks and stuff and feel the texture and all. Good on your Yasir. Oh yeah Sridevi came over to take photographs for us to go on papers… ALL OVER EUROPE… Imagine that! I don’t know man day 4 always has some magic to it, be it basic course or whatever. And lets just say some wishes come true some things fall in place etc etc. Rehearse songs. And the last two headcounts worked out so fast… usually takes more than 3 goes to get it right. Plant trees with the kids as our seva/service project. Auditions for the play. Debrief. Decide to go for pizza but first over to Su’s to sort out certificates, press release and one gangsta meditation. The last time I got so many jerks was when I did my Sahaj Samadhi meditation course with Su. Ended up hitting Jonathan at one point. But yeah even sleep these days is that lovely sleep be it on the tubes or bed. Time for pizza, lots of lovely food at Franka Manka or something like that. Taz and Nick drop by. Taz stays over for some food. Chit chat etc. Told ya day for is like magic.

Day 5 – Finished this silly book Viv asked me to figure out. Everyday I’d chill in the cafe coz I was early as usual and so it was hot beverage and reading till it was time. Get a surprise for my group… mostly some chocolate croissants that I didn’t like lol. Oh and after last nights meditation I’d been so spaced since. Even forgot to do my homework and sort out a script. Painting meditation. Now my Zurha likes being difficult so she thought she’d be clever and paint the whole sheet black coz her eyes were closed during the meditation and thats what she saw right… wrong… according to the adults they read all kindsa darkness into it. Su had given me the camera for the week and I was like dang man I wanna be in some pics! Anyway Shridevi will hook that up. Was not happy about the dude with beard = God stuff. Man trying to get the kids to listen for a second to rehearse for the play was nuts but somehow it always works out. Friends and fam come over to see the drumming, singing and play. Shut up shop and bye byes. Get to McD’s just to mail you guys the Friday publication. What can I say gotta have some disciplines. Oh but McD server was down so I’m at JD Wetherspoons. So packed and everyones getting their drink on ready to party and this Gayanian couple were good enough to share their table. I’m looking ruff and on a posh as Mac on a busy Friday eve… picture that it you will.

The crew – Head teach Su amazing as always. Big up Jagruti for hooking it up and letting me know I don’t need the CRB to come. Big up Shobna, Nayla and Saroj ben for the grub… love the way they talk, just wanna pinch their cheeks. Mrudula was an ART Excel teach but she’d never taught the 5 day one and I guess it was new to her in a way. Everytime I saw her name tag I’d crack up silently coz it looked like MR. UDULA. We had Jonathan who usually takes the YES course. Peter was amazing, soft spoken, great a footie and just well mannered and all. We had Joshua the loud one that kept things in check and gorgeous Carolina, not my type coz she’s tall and skinny but I just wanted to take the Photoshop colour picker and sample her face for swatches. Lovely pastel colours from skin, hair, lips, eyes and clothing. Picture a blond Angelina.

So yeah… this was exactly what I needed, was feeling extra depressed with no work and love life on pause after being fed up of these 2 month stand situations. And other things. Guruji usually says best cure for depression is seva/service and boy has it helped. The physical affection from kids even if it was kicks and pinches, the feeling of doing something that helps, being busy constantly, etc. And some how some way… wishes just come true. I’d kinda forgotten about my past and when I saw the kids I was like I feel you man so I got to appreciate how far I’ve come since then. Hell I even feel like adding a song for old times sake.

Heart don’t fail me now, Courage don’t desert me,
Don’t turn back now that we’re here,
People always say life is full of choices,
No one ever mentions fear,
Or how the road can seem so long, How the world can seem so vast.

Somewhere down this road, I know someone’s waiting,
Years of dreams just can’t be wrong,
Arms will open wide, I’ll be safe and wanted,
Finally home where I belong,
Well starting here my life begins.
Starting now I’m learning fast.

Home, love, family. There was once a time I must have had them too,
Home, love, family. I will never be complete until I find you.

One step at a time, One hope then another,
Who knows where this road may go?
Back to who I was, On to find my future,
Things my heart still needs to know,
Yes let this be a sign, Let this road be mine,
Courage see me through, Heart I am trusting you,
To bring me home.
At last! At last!
Journey to the Past – Aaliyah